Editorial

Google Searches For ‘My Eyes Hurt’ Skyrocket After Idiots Stare Into Eclipse

Kent Nishimura/Getty Images

Robert McGreevy Contributor
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Google searches for the term “my eyes hurt” skyrocketed Monday afternoon as a solar eclipse swept across the United States, according to data from Google Trends.

Despite numerous warnings from scientists not to look directly at the sun during the eclipse because it could damage the observer’s retinas permanently, apparently many Americans did not heed this advice and immediately took to Google to figure out what was going on.

Google Trends data showing increased volume of searches for "my eyes hurt" in the wake of Monday's solar eclipse. 4/8/24. Screenshot/trends.Google..com

Google Trends data showing increased volume of searches for “my eyes hurt” in the wake of Monday’s solar eclipse. 4/8/24. Screenshot/trends.Google..com

Searches for the term “my eyes hurt” began to rise sharply around 1:20 p.m. in the United States, as the eclipse began to make its way across North America. The search trend continued to rise for two hours, reaching its peak at 3:20 p.m., just minutes before the eclipse peaked in most parts of the East Coast.

WASHINGTON, DC – APRIL 8: People gather on the National Mall to view the partial solar eclipse on April 8, 2024 in Washington, DC. People have traveled to areas across North America that are in the “path of totality” in order to experience the eclipse today, with the next total solar eclipse that can be seen from a large part of North America won’t happen until 2044. Kent Nishimura/Getty Images

The search term for “why do my eyes hurt” also briefly shot up as some smooth brains apparently needed help diagnosing their retinal pain after staring directly into the sun. (RELATED: ‘The View’ Hosts Try To Explain Science Behind Eclipse. It Went How You’d Expect)

MAZATLAN, MEXICO - APRIL 08: The moon crosses in front of the sun during the Great North American Eclipse on April 08, 2024 in Mazatlan, Mexico. Millions of people have flocked to areas across North America that are in the "path of totality" in order to experience a total solar eclipse. During the event, the moon will pass in between the sun and the Earth, appearing to block the sun. Hector Vivas/Getty Images

MAZATLAN, MEXICO – APRIL 08: The moon crosses in front of the sun during the Great North American Eclipse on April 08, 2024 in Mazatlan, Mexico.  Hector Vivas/Getty Images

WAPAKONETA, OHIO - APRIL 8: The sun and the moon align completely, with solar prominences visible, during the total solar eclipse on April 8, 2024 in Wapakoneta, Ohio. Totality lasted for alomst four minutes in Ohio. Millions of people have flocked to areas across North America that are in the "path of totality" in order to experience a total solar eclipse. During the event, the moon will pass in between the sun and the Earth, appearing to block the sun. Matthew Hatcher/Getty Images

WAPAKONETA, OHIO – APRIL 8: The sun and the moon align completely, with solar prominences visible, during the total solar eclipse on April 8, 2024 in Wapakoneta, Ohio. Totality lasted for almost four minutes in Ohio. Matthew Hatcher/Getty Images

WASHINGTON, DC - APRIL 8: People gather on the National Mall to view the partial solar eclipse on April 8, 2024 in Washington, DC. People have traveled to areas across North America that are in the "path of totality" in order to experience the eclipse today, with the next total solar eclipse that can be seen from a large part of North America won't happen until 2044. Kent Nishimura/Getty Images

WASHINGTON, DC – APRIL 8: People gather on the National Mall to view the partial solar eclipse on April 8, 2024 in Washington, DC. Kent Nishimura/Getty Images

Am I surprised that so many dummies ate the forbidden fruit? Did literally the one thing that they weren’t supposed to do? No, not at all. This is America, and one thing that comes with the freedom to choose is the freedom to make bad choices. But still, I’ve gotta hand it to these folks. Unless they live under a rock, they probably read, heard of and watched a million different warnings about staring at the sun and said, “screw it, I’m doing it anyway, it’ll be fine.”

Well … judging by the results of these search trends, for some people it most certainly was not fine.